Work ooooohhh dear work.
Hello everyone,
So today I am at work at one of our satellite stores and well, I am bored. BORED OUT OF MY MIND... and I guess I am here to complain about the broken computer, the lack of work to do, and that the only customer I had all day wasn't even a customer, but the mail lady. GOSH! In the mean time, I am entertaining myself with some cool songs on youtube.com, I am watching videos of this Spanish group called La Oreja de Van Gogh. They sing Spanish rock and their lyrics (if you understand Spanish) are so sweet and down to earth.
My favorite song of theirs and which is the one who introduced me to the group is called Rosas. The lyrics basically tells a story about a girl who was in a relationship with this guy and she cared for him a lot. After six months he broke up with her by saying "it was a pleasure being with you but it's time we part ways." She put her hands to her heart and asks why is he leaving her and his excuse is he doesn't even know. So every Friday, she would wait with a teary face hoping she would see him and he would bring her roses, but he never did.
Every time I break up with someone I play this song, and I guess after I broke up (if you could even call it break up) with the last person I was talking to, this song really hits home. This person, for the first time, well in seven years, was someone really special to me. We shared something really special before he even told me he cared about me. We shared a few great weeks of being together, then he freaked out about being in a relationship (because he had just gotten out of one not long before ours) and it was all over. So every time I listen to this song, it hits home.
Lately, I have been getting really emotional. Very sad. Impossible to get over him. And not because I want to be attached to him, but because, he keeps talking to me. He is one of those guys that is not a normal regular guy, that once he goes out with someone he never talks to them again. NO. He is one of those nice guys, that even though it didn't work out, he still wants to be friends and talk to you all the time. It is very difficult to get over someone like that, because I am so used to jerks who break up with me and move on to the next girl. But as for him, he is nice and every time I talk to him I think "WTF! why can't we be together again?" I hate it.
Then by thinking that, I start to think oh great, something has to be wrong with me. I am so used to jerks and now I have this guy who isn't being a jerk and is trying to continue to be my friend. Then in the other side (I swear I feel like I have the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other) I think well, he is nice, but why is he being nice to me? So I won't call him a jerk? He doesn't care about your feelings, he doesn't care about you. So maybe he is a jerk. AHHH! I just blocked him for now from my aim, and deactivated my facebook. See I told you folks, maybe my friends are right, I am a little looney! Or maybe I am just misunderstood. I wanna talk to him about this, but my friends keep telling me that every time I talk to him is like breaking up all over again. Maybe I do prefer jerks over nice guys since the jerks vanish from your life, and the nice guys continue being there, sort like teasing you and saying "haha, I know you like me and I know you care and we are still friends cuz I am such a nice guy, but we will never be together cuz I am afraid of commitment." All I wanna say is AHHHHHHHH! lol.
Ok gtg now, customer is here! Yey finally work to do. But for now I will still listen to Rosas.
Until next time.
Miss Understood
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